I feel like The Daily Post and the Zero To Hero internet government spiders that read wavelengths have decided to strictly focus on my brain today. As we all know, internet government spiders exist and are fully capable of doing that. What we also know, is that I’ve been trying to get back in the blog swing of things. So, on January 2, I put on my big girl writing pants and  gaff taped myself to my trusty Macbook Pro (now accepting endorsements for the generous product placement of both gaff tape and Macbook Pro).

The is Gaff Tape.

This is a Macbook Pro. I like Macbook Pro. I also like all Apple products and would very much like free things from Apple.

Not long after pulling off this stunt, I realized typing gaffed to my Macbook Pro was not a productive, nor comfortable way of tackling the neglect I had shown my blog. I scoured the web for other options on how to solve this heavy weighing problem, and also switched to my normal size girl pants.

Eureka.

The Zero to Hero 30 day challenge AND reading the Daily Prompt. Today’s challenge and prompt happen to fall 2 days short of my one year anniversary in HEMA. What is HEMA and how did I get mixed up in this crazy world of super pointy, shiny objects? I refer you over here for a great read. For those too lazy to take the extra 4 minutes to read something I poured my heart and soul into, f*#k you. And also, HEMA stands for Historical European Martial Arts. If you had taken the time to read that killer post that is also incredibly witty, informative, hilarious and brilliant, you would know that almost a year ago today, I went beyond the pale. I stepped outside of my norm and tried something that I had always been fascinated with, whether via a consecutive year obsession with THE fight scene from The Princess Bride, or the legendary lightsaber fight between Luke and Anakin, commonly known by his villain name, Darth Vader, in The Empire Strikes Back.

Hello. My name is Indigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Sword fighting, or in this case, lightsaber fighting. often leads to upside down crosses. That is pretty damn metal. How could you NOT want to learn this art?

Starting HEMA and rapier lessons, was COMPLETELY out of the ordinary for me. I definitely crept out of my self satisfying complacency and after just one lesson, felt completely empowered, inspired and, well, quite frankly, pretty badass. Lying in bed that night, I began jotting down ideas for a blog. Short story ideas, themes, titles…and then I started imagining of all of the shoes I would buy once I became a millionaire from blogging. Needless to say, I’ve bought many of those shoes, but no thanks to the lack of millions.

The point is, that stepping beyond the pale…leaving my comfort zone and trying something I had always wanted to try, led me to this. Claiming my piece of the world wide web and spewing a bunch of crap. And people actually read it. Within minutes of posting my first bit of BS nearly a year ago, I had some “likes” and “followers”. These were actual strangers who literally tripped over my blog, likely by total accident, decided to read it, likely while intoxicated on some level, and actually dug it. My suppressed passion for fencing awakened my sincere love of writing and brought to life the garbage you’ve been tricked into reading by way of cool pictures of gaff tape and Star Wars.

Not too freaking shabby.

In closing, here’s a picture of me pretending to kill someone. If you’d like more blogs on HEMA and my fencing progress, I’m going to need at least 20 likes, so the proverbial ball is in your court.

Random truck stop on tour in Hungary where bass players are taken outside for target practice. Because they are bass players.